Archive for March, 2009

We all know war is a bad thing, but reading this book really gives an insight as to how it damages the land over which its raged. The way community and life is ripped to pieces and the fabric of society unravels and is rewoven as something less appealing is well portrayed. To come through this and be able to share the story as well as attempt to rebuild and heal says a lot for the authoress.

The violence is never glorified, nor is the atrocities, but told in a way that taps into your emotions and grips at you unforgettably. Forget the film, even though the key events are portrayed, the book is far tougher with the Hollywood romanticism stripped way.

If you wnat an understanding of how war affected the people of vietnam, and how much of a piece of heaven it destroyed you need to read this book. I finished reading this on the train and it was hard not to cry my eyes out, not just for the events and family of LeLy Hayslip, but for all the people she knew and met and the beautiful way of life that is so sadly lost now.

i wish i could write something as powerful as this one day.


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… now having read ‘murakami and music of words’ that someone else writes the same way i do. That they too start with a scene and just write and see where it takes them Perhaps that’s why I have taken to his work so much 🙂

I haven’t written much in the last few days because i have a cold and feeling run down and i also wanted to do something creative media-wise. Thoughts of the fics are never far from my mind though and i expect i shall finish the chapter i am working on soon.

Currently reading a history novel about how China discovered the world before anyone else did – totally fascinating and i think i will get the next book about the Venetian renaissance they inspired too. I am also reading the last book in the Magravandian Trilogy by Storm Constantine which is still very enjoyable and will be finished by the time the weekend comes i am sure.

what to read next though…. I have a feeling i will read the two gao xingian novels thta are on my shelf as they are far too big for the commute and they have been waiting 6 years to be read too hehe. It will be a chnage of pace, but it will be nice to finally get tot them.

my supply of books is running low in a few months – does this mean i finally pay off my library fine of £25 and head back to that? or shall i just join the one near my folks and bother them for things hehe. London one would be more convenient and better stocked, but i have a real grudge against the reason i ahve those fines and thats why i have no wish to pay them ….

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I have been promising myself for the last few weeks and months that I would cease to write fanfics anymore, but resisting the urge is proving harder than i thought. I have done fan-fic writing as long as i can remember, even when it was just me telling myself stories about book characters and TV shows to amuse myself. ‘Robin of sherwood’ ‘Star Trek’ ‘Star Trek TNG’ ‘DS9’ ‘Voyager’  I went through all that although the Start Trek ones were very short lived, never shared and happily abandoned. I wrote on and off through uni on various things (usually vampires but not Buffy) and then stopped for a while and started up again when i got into Chinese and Korean Music 6 years ago.

The first fic i wrote was set in shanghai in the 1920s and left incomplete (as referred to on an earlier post) which had a rather bloody cliffhanger point and that was that. I knew how it ended, i just never made it there. The next and the 1st to be completed was set in Hong Kong and a spin-off from a fic a friend was writing. and i was going to write more but that too died a death as the forum i was in at the time had its own demise too.

I then began the gangster trilogy which i am still wrestling with right now, but i am still writing other fics and trying to finish off the ones i started and yet i still get more ideas. Darn shinhwa for being so inspirational eh??

The main reason i have as to not write more fics is that i think it begins to feed people’s obsessions and envelopes them so deeply in a fandom that it loses them perspective. It happened to me ages ago and the emotional involvement people have with the characters they are reading bleeds into the real world and changes their views on things. On the one hand its flattering and feels good that words written can be so powerful as to have this effect, but i feel responsible too that this might in some way hurt people or damage their relationships or potential opportunities in real life to HAVE a relationship with someone real and not unobtainable.

I do still want to write fics, but i think its time i worked harder at my non fan fic stories to really develop characters and situations that are unique and yet still as engaging as the fan fic ones. I guess it helps that i usually ‘cast’ the characters before rather than write about who i thought they were, as i wouldn’t even start to presume i know what they are like in real life.

so, i finish what i started for sure, but what of the ones i started and never posted yet – is it possible for me to change it to be a proper fiction than just a fic? I don’t like to let ideas go so easily.

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“Any word you have to hunt for in a thesaurus is the wrong word. There are no exceptions to this rule.” – Stephen King

OK – i agree in principle that this is true. After all, just replacing one word with one you think is better or more suited just because you have browsed in the thesaurus really causes the worst possible mistakes, but i don’t think Stephen King is allowing for those of us who just can’t quite remember what the word we are looking for is.

I love my thesaurus, simply because i love the subtle differences between words and the way they can change tone… This set was on my mind this morning…

fake, false, reproduction, imitation, replica, copy, clone

Have a nice think on these – what would you use in which situation? which is positive or negative? swap a few in and out of a sentence and see what happens…

For me a thesaurus is like any other tool – if you don’t know how to use it, don’t touch it. If you don’t know the exact meaning an nuance of a word – don’t use it, even if it does sound more interesting and intellectual. Some people use a thesaurus like it was going out of fashion, plucking words from it like they would their eyebrows and applying them like a 5 year old smears on lipstick.

tsk tsk…

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found it…?

wonder of wonders i finished chapter (albeit short) 51 and miracles of miracles i have written a good chunk of chapter 52!!! I wont say i have the edge on this back yet, but a few gleams of light are hovering in my consciousness and things look like they are about to get interesting….

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lost it…

yup… lost the plot on this one. I really, and i mean that from the bottom of my heart and toes, want to finish the gangster fic but have been struggling with the current chapter a few weeks now. I don’t think i have lost touch so much as lost confidence with what i am doing. I should continue to be writing it for me, but i am beginning to think i am worrying too much about what readers want to hear and think. Over the next few days i will triple my efforts to get this chapter done and immerse myself in the characters totally. I will reread the original plot and get back into the groove, i have to, i really must as this and the prequel which comes next will be the last fan fic i will be writing. (more on that another time)

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World Book Day

Books lied about – i have actually read the number one listed book – not a lie!

World Book Day site

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